| Author |
Message |
    
Jacko
Username: Jacko
Registered: 10-2007
| | Posted on Wednesday, November 28, 2007 - 1:08 pm: | |
What's the difference between an onion and an accordian?
No one cries when you cut up an accordian! |
Jacko
Username: Jacko
Registered: 10-2007
| | Posted on Wednesday, November 28, 2007 - 1:13 pm: | |
How do you get rid of a drummer at your door step?
Pay him for the pizza! |
Jacko
Username: Jacko
Registered: 10-2007
| | Posted on Wednesday, November 28, 2007 - 1:15 pm: | |
How do you get rid of a drummer at your door step?
Pay him for the pizza! |
Munch
Username: Munch
Registered: 2-2001
| | Posted on Wednesday, November 28, 2007 - 6:36 pm: | |
How do you know when a drummer is at your doorstep?
The knocking gets faster and he doesn't know when to come in! |
Guitarwhisperer
Username: Guitarwhisperer
Registered: 6-2007
| | Posted on Wednesday, November 28, 2007 - 9:36 pm: | |
How can you tell when the drum riser is level?
The drool comes out of both sides of the drummers mouth! |
Sixvsix
Username: Sixvsix
Registered: 3-2002
| | Posted on Wednesday, November 28, 2007 - 10:23 pm: | |
What do you call a Drummer with no girlfriend?
Homeless!
six |
Jacko
Username: Jacko
Registered: 10-2007
| | Posted on Thursday, November 29, 2007 - 1:00 pm: | |
How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?
20-- One to hold the light bulb and 19 to drink untill the room spins.
Love the drool one lol! |
Bobzilla
Username: Bobzilla
Registered: 2-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, November 29, 2007 - 1:18 pm: | |
What do you call a guy that likes to hang out with musicians....?
...... a drummer. |
Jacko
Username: Jacko
Registered: 10-2007
| | Posted on Thursday, November 29, 2007 - 1:25 pm: | |
If you throw a drummer and an accordian player off a cliff at the same time, who would hit the ground first?
---------who cares!? |
Bobzilla
Username: Bobzilla
Registered: 2-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, November 29, 2007 - 2:48 pm: | |
What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead drummer in the road...?
There's skid marks before the dog. |
Chucke99
Username: Chucke99
Registered: 2-2007
| | Posted on Thursday, November 29, 2007 - 4:11 pm: | |
Yes, I found that page of musician jokes too. My favorite so far:
How many bassists does it take to change a lightbulb?
One. Five. One. Five... |
Harry
Username: Harry
Registered: 3-2001
| | Posted on Friday, November 30, 2007 - 2:08 am: | |
I´m a bassplayer....I dont get it....
Harry |
Bobzilla
Username: Bobzilla
Registered: 2-2005
| | Posted on Friday, November 30, 2007 - 7:11 am: | |
Harry, that's funny. And... where is this list of jokes? |
Talajuha
Username: Talajuha
Registered: 11-2006
| | Posted on Friday, November 30, 2007 - 7:40 am: | |
One of them (list of jokes) full of old jokes
http://www.ducksdeluxe.com/jokes.html
and you find them on many other sites by googling 'musician jokes'.
Juha |
Ibanezfreak1960
Username: Ibanezfreak1960
Registered: 3-2004
| | Posted on Friday, November 30, 2007 - 11:38 am: | |
Why did the French Horn players wife file for a divorce?
Because every time he kissed her he tried to stick his hand up her butt. |
Ibanezfreak1960
Username: Ibanezfreak1960
Registered: 3-2004
| | Posted on Friday, November 30, 2007 - 11:46 am: | |
Here is a pic to show you all what that joke means....
 |
Bobzilla
Username: Bobzilla
Registered: 2-2005
| | Posted on Friday, November 30, 2007 - 1:12 pm: | |
What's wrong with him sticking his hand up her butt anyways? He should stick his hand up her butt. It's probably why he married her... so he could do that. |
Chucke99
Username: Chucke99
Registered: 2-2007
| | Posted on Friday, November 30, 2007 - 1:46 pm: | |
Harry, maybe it could be:
One. Three. Five. Seven. Eight. Seven. Five. Three. One. (with a walking beat) |
Jacko
Username: Jacko
Registered: 10-2007
| | Posted on Friday, November 30, 2007 - 1:56 pm: | |
There were two people walking down the street.
One of them was a musician, the other one didn't have any money either. |
Ibanezfreak1960
Username: Ibanezfreak1960
Registered: 3-2004
| | Posted on Friday, November 30, 2007 - 4:05 pm: | |
Whats the difference between a drummer and a pizza?
The pizza can feed a family of 4. |
Guitarwhisperer
Username: Guitarwhisperer
Registered: 6-2007
| | Posted on Friday, November 30, 2007 - 9:55 pm: | |
What's funny is, the last band I was in (ten years ago) the drummer lived with his girlfriend, delivered pizza for a living, and was a beer drinker. I'm not kidding. |
Sixvsix
Username: Sixvsix
Registered: 3-2002
| | Posted on Saturday, December 01, 2007 - 5:53 am: | |
six |
Gemberbier
Username: Gemberbier
Registered: 5-2006
| | Posted on Sunday, December 02, 2007 - 12:39 am: | |
My two favourite Dutch comedians, Koot & Bie, about Nigel Kennedy:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4pNFz5YdpD4
Ginger |
Guitarwhisperer
Username: Guitarwhisperer
Registered: 6-2007
| | Posted on Sunday, December 02, 2007 - 1:50 pm: | |
Fantastische verzameling, je behoort daar een publieksprijs voor te krijgen !! |
Guitarwhisperer
Username: Guitarwhisperer
Registered: 6-2007
| | Posted on Sunday, December 02, 2007 - 6:56 pm: | |
Actually, I don't really speak Dutch, I just pasted that from the comments section below the video. I was trying to be funny, since this is a joke section. Didn't work.... |
Gemberbier
Username: Gemberbier
Registered: 5-2006
| | Posted on Sunday, December 02, 2007 - 9:47 pm: | |
Well, the comment said that the poster deserved a viewers reward for his collection.
Btw, these two comedians deserve a price for their work. There's a special exhibition about their work now.
So far for Nigel Kennedy, "the guy next door with a T-shirt and an oversized blazer... not too oversized, because then his sleeves get jammed between the strings".
Ginger |
Bobzilla
Username: Bobzilla
Registered: 2-2005
| | Posted on Monday, December 03, 2007 - 1:20 pm: | |
GW, my last drummer delivered pizzas too, I swear to God! I just spoke with him yersterday, works at a Deli now but he did deliver pizza for years while he was in the band. He even got robbed at gunpoint (a rifle) delivering pizza one night. |
Jacko
Username: Jacko
Registered: 10-2007
| | Posted on Tuesday, December 04, 2007 - 2:33 pm: | |
Probably by another drummer. |
Hackneyslim
Username: Hackneyslim
Registered: 2-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, December 04, 2007 - 4:17 pm: | |
What's the difference between a drummer and a drum machine?
You only have to punch the information into a drum machine once.
h |
Jacko
Username: Jacko
Registered: 10-2007
| | Posted on Friday, December 07, 2007 - 1:54 pm: | |
A guy walks into a guitar store and goes straight to the collectables room. He spots a beautiful AR 5000 sitting on a stand in the corner. He walked over to get a better look at it and as soon as he bends down to look closer..he breaks wind.--He nervously looked around to see if anyone had entered the room and noticed. Just then a sales man entered the room and said, "Can I help you sir?".
Hoping his little "oops" was not noticed, the mand said,"Yes, I was wondering what the price is on this guitar".
The Salesman said,"Mr. if you farted just looking at it, you're going to Sh#$ when I tell you the price!".
(adapted from a diamond bracelet joke) |
Guitarwhisperer
Username: Guitarwhisperer
Registered: 6-2007
| | Posted on Friday, December 07, 2007 - 10:37 pm: | |
That's great! I like the way you "formatted" the joke for the forum! |
Skybone
Username: Skybone
Registered: 3-2001
| | Posted on Monday, December 10, 2007 - 8:23 am: | |
How do you know there's a singer at your door?
Even when you tell him, he still doesn't know when to come in!
How do you know a bass player's knocking on your door?
He's knocking out of time...
How do you know a guitarist is knocking on your door?
He doesn't know when to stop knocking... ;) |